How God Saved Me from Me


Dedication

I dedicate this writing to God. He created this magnificent World of ours, and he is my Shield and Buckler. I could not have grown in the Lord so much, or continued my walk with God, without my precious wife Stephanie. She is a light in the darkness for me. My children, Mitchell, Alyssa, and Mason, who in many ways have taught me so much, and continue to teach me. My family is a gift from God. Without my family, I wouldn’t be where I am today.


Foreword

I am writing this, because I need to tell my story. This is a brief look into my life, which I’m about to tell you. I want you to understand and learn, how my life led me to where I am now. If only one person can be helped by the conviction of the Holy Spirit, which will let them understand the truth when they hear it; then, writing this will be worth it. The lord had been directing me all my life. He had protected me from all sorts of evil. When I say evil, I mean pure evil. I couldn’t have survived without the Lord’s protection. Even as a child, I knew God was there, and I prayed to him for protection, for my family and I, and don’t forget the dogs. Yes, I asked the Lord to please protect trouble, bear, Tina, Wendy, and Sampson. I have to tell everyone what God did for me, and I am still a work in progress. May God receive all the honor and all the glory. I am a sinner whom has been given the only thing that I need – God’s grace. The Lord, Jesus Christ, saved me from me.


How I was Saved

I had just lost a job with a good company, due to my own fault. When I was let go, I cried in the human resource office. I was crushed. The tears weren’t because I’d miss the work, but because I had let my family down. While driving home, I asked myself what I was going to do, and how would I tell my wife I lost my job. How would I tell my oldest son Mitch, whom at the time was 14 years old? Mitch was expecting to have braces on his teeth, and he needed money for school. The more I thought about the situation, the more I cried. When I told my wife, her eyes opened up like a full moon, and she controlled the shock quite well, at least in front of me. She was very supportive. I started looking for a new job right away, but nothing seemed good enough. A friend got me a job working 7 days a week, 12 hours a day. I was miserable, because every day I would drive one hour to work and one hour home. I then worked harder and longer at the new job and got paid $7 an hour less than what I was use to. I was use to getting overtime for any hours worked over 8 hours –per day. My salary went from an average of 95k a year to about 45k a year. That was a humbling event. I never saw my family much, for the hours and drive to this job consumed me. While trying to go to sleep one night, I felt sick to my stomach, full of grief and hopelessness. I decided to pray and ask God to help me in my time of need. I cried to the Lord, and asked the Lord to forgive me of all my sins, which took me a long time. I mentioned everything I had done my entire life, at least everything I could remember. I will never forget my next words. I said, "Lord, if you don’t help me, no one will." I then lay down to sleep. I was on the verge of falling asleep, but not yet asleep. I was in twilight sleep. Then it happened! I saw an evil spirit, which moved so fast, I couldn’t reason if it was coming or going. While this was happening, it was cursing more words than I could count. I couldn’t believe the foul language. I never heard so much filth, not even when I was in the Navy. I sat up and looked around in confusion. I was confused and concerned at the same time. It moved quickly. I could clearly hear the cursing, and I could feel the anger this demon had. I got up and looked in the mirror. I wasn’t sure what had just happened to me. I knew God had just moved in my life, and I was full of questions. I walked around the house and looked at my wife and my youngest son Mason, who both were sleeping on the couch in the living room. I wasn’t aware of the direction my life was heading. God delivered me from my hatred towards others and myself. God delivered me from my foul mouth. He let me see the deliverance. He let me understand what happened. He let me see me, the way others had seen me for a long time. God delivered me. Praise you God. May all the Glory be to God. Many things happened to me throughout years. It is hard for me to describe them, but I will give it a shot, so you too can hopefully learn something from my childhood.


Background

I was baptized a Mormon. I, like other children from Mormon homes, was baptized when I was 8 years old. My mom was a Mormon, and my dad was a Lutheran. I remember someone telling me years ago, that my dad either went to seminary or dropped out of seminary. He wanted to be a preacher. I don’t know if this is true, because I don’t know my dad very well. Anyway, neither my dad nor my mom went to church. My mom always found a way to get me to church on Sundays. I either had a ride from a church member, or my mom would take me and drop me off. I was told by Brother Campbell, the man who took me to church most of the time, that the Bishop said their was something special about me, but he wasn’t sure what it was. The Bishop also told my mother that. I thought at the time, that they told all children’s parents that. I had fun at church most of the time, but I would often find myself hiding in the bathrooms, or walking down one of the streets around the church. I would then go back into the church and wait for my mother to pick me up. Religion was never discussed in my home very often. The only thing said about it was from my mother. She would tell me to say my prayers. I was taught this prayer: now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep, if I die before I wake, I pray the lord my soul to take. My mother listened to the music of the Beatles, Led Zeppelin, and too many to remember or mention. She was always dancing and singing in the mirror. I did the same. My mother and uncle, her brother, would gather around, while I stood on a coffee table and sang. I had chores to do daily. One day’s chores were as follows: clean the bathrooms, shake rugs, vacuum house, and dust. I had chores 5 days a week, and some weekends. On weekends, my mother would write down about 20 chores on a piece of paper, tear the paper into strips, fold them up and put them into a hat. Her and I would then draw one chore at a time, and then go do whatever that tasks, chore, was. My mom was a clean freak.

My dad and I were never close. I always preferred not to see him. He was always grumpy. He worked all the time, but as a child, I didn’t understand that. He worked for a Railroad. He was always going to union meetings, and he even converted our third bedroom into his office. He spent a lot of time in that office. You didn’t bother him, not while he was in his office. His mother, my Grandmother Billie, didn’t get along with my mother. My mother once threw a clothes iron at her. I was told, that my grandmother Billie referred to me as "not her grandson." She would say that her grandson, Robert, was her only grandson. Robert was my dad’s son from a previous marriage. Grandmother Billie would come over our home a few times a year. She lived in Dallas, but didn’t want to see us. My dad went over her house quite often, and I didn’t go but maybe a few times. My mother made sure that whenever she came over, she would cook hotdogs. We either had the whole dog on a bun, or sliced hotdogs with something else. It never changed, not when grandmother Billie came over. During Christmas time, Robert, my half brother would come and stay with us. Grandmother Billie would buy him all sorts of presents. He had so many presents to open. Grandmother Billie would bring me 1 present. You see, she took her anger, which she had for my mother, out on me. I stayed to myself most of the time. I would often find myself grounded, weeks or a month at a time, for one thing or another. I had a lot of quiet time, due to the rules of my grounding. I couldn’t watch television, eat sweets, go outside in the back yard, or listen to the radio, and my chore list would grow. I basically would sit on my bed and stare at the wall. I prayed often, but I wasn’t totally sure of God’s existence. I had only experienced the evil around me, at least that’s what I thought at the time.


First Home in Arlington Texas

I only remember a few things, about the first home I grew up in. I have to say I was about 2-4 yrs old. I remember my room very clearly. The home was an older home. The garage had been converted into a living room. I was later told that two men working on a car, in what use to be the garage, before we moved in, fell on them and killed them. There were a few times when my dad, mom, and I would come home, and all the doors and windows were open. My parents would call the police, and even the cops were afraid to go into our home. They wouldn’t ever want to go into the attic, but they would shine their lights up there, and then check the rest of the house before leaving. They couldn’t ever find any evidence of forced entry. I always felt like something was trying to get me, but sometimes when we reflect on our younger years, we find excuses and answers for things, just so we can feel better. Who knows if anything was trying to get me, but I sure felt like it. Only God knows what else I saw in that house and blocked out of my memory. I always found myself running down the hallway to the bathroom. The bathroom was my safe haven, from whatever was chasing me. Once, I was home with my dad. I don’t know where my mother was, but I do remember she wasn’t at home with us. I was playing, in the backyard in the dirt, with my dump truck. My dad opened the door and yelled at me to get in the house. When I got to the doorway, he kicked me in the rear like a football player kicking a field goal. I’m surprised my diaper didn’t fall off. I hit either the washer or dryer. I don’t remember what happened after that. One time, I remember doing something to my mother’s cigarettes. She made me eat a few cigarettes. Maybe this is why I never wanted to start smoking, and to this day I haven’t. I was so scared of something in that house. I didn’t know what that something was, until we moved into our new home in Southwest Arlington Texas.


Second Home in Arlington Texas

When I was about 4 years old, I was riding my bike down at the end of the block. It was a dirt road. We lived in a new development. There were wild animals that would come around at night. Anyway, woods surrounded our community. While I was riding my bicycle, two older kids grabbed me and pulled me into the woods behind some homes. They threw me down on a mattress. They then bent the mattress in half, with me in the middle, and they proceeded to jump up and down on it. They then tied me to a tree and started beating me. They laughed the whole time. I don’t remember what they said to me or to each other, but they took much pleasure in beating and hurting me. I eventually was set free, because both boys left after a while. They left me tied to that tree. I don’t know how long I was tied to that tree, but later some time, a girl a few years or so older than me heard me crying. She untied me and went to the dirt road nearby to get help. The police were called and not too long after, the two boys were caught. They were in Junior high, and they both went to juvenile hall, because of what they did to me. This is just a distant memory, but it shows what kids will do when something evil governs their whole surroundings, or something evil is trying to set a mark on your life. I started hearing and seeing things when I was very young. I’m not even sure what age I was when the torment started. I would be in my parent’s bathroom, and the door would shake and the doorknob would twists. I always locked the door, because I was always scared. I, at first, would think that it was my mom or dad playing tricks on me, but I would hear them both through the wall, which would put them in the living room, laughing at the television, or talking to each other. Whenever things like this happened to me, which was too numerous to count, I would cry and pray to Jesus. I would ask Jesus to help me. Now that I look back, I do remember that as soon as I started praying, the door would stop shaking, and the doorknob would stop trying to turn. I would then wait for a while, and then I would slowly open the door and run to the living room. I sometimes would tell them what happened, but I felt they didn’t believe me. I remember one night when I seen a pair of red eyes looking right at me, while I was lying in my bed. I remember the eyes blinking once, but then I don’t remember anything, but hiding under the cover and losing consciousness. I do remember asking myself the next day if it could have been anything else. My closet doors were a brown color and they were closed. The eyes I seen were truly eyes, and they were red. I also could make out a body, which was the body of a wolf. The eyes are what I remember the most. The redness was so deep and so bright, and so full of wickedness. I will never forget them trying to pierce into my soul. I haven’t seen those eyes since I was a young child. Thank you, God. I had many occasions where I would wake up and see spirits floating above my bed. These spirits were full size. What I mean by that is, the size of an average human. I would see them floating, as if they were going to lie on top of me. I would pull the covers over my head and cry myself to sleep. Sometimes, it would seem as a dream. They would appear to me while I was in a twilight sleep. Once, my mom was reprimanding my cousin and I for something we did wrong. She told us that if we didn’t say we were sorry, the devil was going to get us. Then, at that same moment, someone or something started to try to get in my bedroom window. My aunt and mom were in the room with us, and as far as I can remember, no one else was at our home that day. My dad was at work. Maybe my mom put someone up to it. I can’t say, because I couldn’t see whatever it was. My mom told me to pray, and as soon as I started praying, the scratching and banging on the window stopped. I was just so scared that I remember it today. I will never forget.

One night, I woke up and reached under my pillow, to see what the tooth fairy had left me. I found some change. I noticed that my Mom was in my room and she said to me, "Go to sleep now". I wanted her to see what the tooth fairy had left me, so I said, "look mama the tooth fairy gave me some money". I then dropped the money into her hand. I actually grabbed her hand and with my other hand, I put the change into her hand. She told me to go to bed, and she put the money back into my hands. I then noticed that my mom had on an all black nightgown. My mom didn’t have an all black nightgown! My mom had a black gown with red around the arms and bottom. I then quickly looked at her face and seen something that I will never forget. I had seen what looked to be a tattoo around the right eye. It was all the way around the eye, on the skin, but wasn’t very bright. It was a dull black. It was deep in the skin. I then shouted and jumped backwards under my covers. I woke up later that morning in a wet bed. It was wet with perspiration. I had passed out, because of the terror I had experienced. I told my mother about it. She said that she had heard me scream, but then I was quiet, so she ignored it. My parents most of the time went to sleep with their bedroom door closed, and they would sleep with a big box fan on the highest setting possible. Later in life, looking back, this was the first time I heard the voice of a spirit. I now know this was an Angel sent to protect me, for I didn’t feel threatened or scared, until I seen her clothes and her eye. I don’t feel that it was there to harm me. I was just a little kid, and I didn’t know anything except, that wasn’t my mother. I can’t explain the tattoo looking ring around her eye. I still think about that sometimes.

When I was in the fifth grade, I played the cello at school. I missed our main concert, which was held at University at Texas in Arlington. I was in the hospital getting a tumor removed from my chest. It was benign thank the Lord, but I still wish I was able to had been at UTA that night. I was scheduled to play a solo, but it never happened. I remember carrying that cello, which at the time was bigger than me, to school. My mother would make me walk to school with it, when she was either angry with me, or was tired. It was about a mile to school. I continued playing the cello during my sixth grade year. My picture was in the Arlington paper. I was recognized as having the potential to be a great cellist. That same year, before the concert at UTA, Tonsillitis caused me to be very sick. I had my tonsils and adenoids removed, during the time the concert was held. I didn’t play the cello again after the sixth grade.


Teen Troubles

My life as a teenager wasn’t one I like to remember much. I was still experiencing grounding and the paddle. When I was in junior high, I would often go running and bike riding for many miles. I didn’t want to be home with my dad. I didn’t want to be anyplace near him. I started running cross-country in the seventh grade. I remember once, I was sick and had the flu, but I went to school anyway. That day we were suppose to run a mile and a half for time. When I crossed the finish line, I looked back and the nearest person to me was on the other side of the football field. I had run that race in nine minutes flat. I went to the nurse after that, because I could barely stand. I won races, during that year in school many times. It wasn’t hard for me. I enjoyed it. I didn’t know, until I was in my early thirties, two of my coaches went to my home, and spoke to my parents. They told my parents that I had great potential, and could one day maybe train for the Olympics. One coach told them that he had previously worked as a scout for Texas A&M, and he was going back there to coach again. He said that he would be looking out for me, because he wanted to recruit me for Texas A&M. My parents never told me, nor did they ever encourage me to run, or play sports. They never went to any of my track meets, nor did they ever talk about it. When I ran cross-country in the tenth grade, I didn’t care to run for sport any more. I ran just to get out of the house. I had developed allergies my ninth grade year. The allergies were so bad, it was hard for me to breathe half the time, and it affected my running my sophomore year. I didn’t run cross-country in school any more after my sophomore year.

Lesson learned:

It doesn’t matter how good you are at something, the devil will try to find a way, and to stop you from using the gifts God gave you. One must persevere.

When I was 15, I started sacking groceries at the local grocery store. I never skipped school, and I stayed away from any situation, that might get me into trouble. My dad would often yell at me, for anything he disagreed with, and I would run out of the house and sit under the light pole on the street corner. He would never chase me outside. Either he was too tired, or didn’t want the neighbors to see. I can remember all the tension in my family as I grew up through out the years. My mother set a curfew for me all the time. If I were ever one minute late, she would lock the door. She also took my keys away from me. One time I was late by a few minutes. My girlfriend dropped me off and I was locked out. I sat there for a while and I didn’t know what to do. I beat on the door, but I wasn’t allowed into the house. My mother didn’t even come to the door, nor did she look out the windows. I ended up leaving with my girlfriend and going to her house. I stayed the night there after I tried to call my house with no one answering. The next day my mother was furious. She told me that I should have stayed in the front yard and slept there. I was grounded again. Later, weeks or months later, my mother was mad that I came home from work late. I explained to her that as soon as I got off, I rode my ten-speed bike straight home. She got so mad, she grabbed a huge metal flashlight, like the mag lights police officers carry, and hit me in the head with it as hard as she could. The batteries flew out of the flashlight and landed across the room. Then she told me to get out of the house and not to come back. I went to a friend’s house but I couldn’t stay with him. I went to the house of a girl I worked with. We worked at Domino’s pizza together. I slept in a car they had in their driveway. The car wasn’t used much. Her dad was a truck driver and he was gone most of the time. I later heard that I was called in as a run away. I had the police looking for me. I was scared and didn’t want to go back home. This girl introduced me to some older teenagers and they were druggies. This girl, whom wasn’t my girlfriend, decided to run away. She snuck into her parent’s room one night and took her dad’s credit cards, while he was on a job across country. She then went to quite a few atms around DFW area and withdrew large amounts of cash. One of the guys with us found a drivers license in a parking lot. We use that to get rooms at hotels. We later heard that the D.E.A. was also looking for us, because the manager at Dominos was a huge drug dealer and he had hired young kids in other states to sell drugs for him. We had to move hotels frequently. Once, we got a phone call from a friend, and he said "get out of there quick. They gave me some money, so I told them where you guys are." We grabbed everything as quick as we could, and as we were leaving the room, we heard police cars nearby. We ran and hid behind a dumpster. Police cars skidded in the parking lot and surrounded our room. They busted in the room and found it empty. They used rakes, to look for signs of drugs on the floor. We waited until they were too busy to see us, and we left. Anyway, after being on the run for many months, and the police was always one step behind us. We started getting bored of each other, and wanted others around, so we went to another girl’s house. She was a friend of the girl that was with us. We spoke to her and planned on picking her up the next day. When I went to her house and knocked on the door the following day, the police pulled up from two different directions. They also had helicopters flying over. I started running. I was jumping fences like hurdles almost. I got a few blocks away and I ran between two houses, whose fences were up to the roof. I couldn’t get over. I was so scared. I was caught. The police officers in plain clothes, took me back to the house we shouldn’t had went to. All sorts of people were there, including my dad. I was threatened with all sorts of crimes. They tried to get me for stealing thousands of dollars from the girl’s dad’s atm card. They weren’t happy to hear that it was the girl, who made all the withdrawals and not me. I was free from any more questions. They didn’t find any drugs on us, so they couldn’t prove anything. I got caught, not because I was not thinking. I was thinking the whole time, about how to stay away from the police. I knew the best thing to do was to trick them. I started a rumor that there was a huge drug fest, which we were all going to attend, and it was in Oklahoma. I told everyone that we needed to stay right here in the area, right under their noses. I wasn’t free from my parent’s though. I went home and went into my room, where the doorknob was missing off the door. My Grandparents were there too. I told them I was scared that some of the drug dealers I knew were going to come after me. I went to live with my grandparents for a year or so.

Lesson Learned:

When the Lord has a plan for you, whether you are aware of it or not, you will be surrounded by the enemy. The enemy waits until you are weak, and then the enemy says, "I can help, come with me." I went and stayed with a bunch of drug addicts, because they were there to help me, at least I thought they were there to help. Their help would have eventually led to death. God intervened and we got caught. I got caught because the Lord loves me.

(Hebrews 12:6-8)

For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child. As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father? If God doesn’t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all.

(Proverbs 3:11-12)

My child, don’t reject the Lord’s discipline, and don’t be upset when he corrects you. For the Lord corrects those he loves, just as a father corrects a child in whom he delights.

I finally went back to school in Arlington the second semester of my junior year. I worked at a movie theatre for a while. It was the best job a young kid could have. I was told that the theatre was haunted and that a spirit had been seen in a particular theatre. I, along with a few other employees and the manager tried to contact the spirit. That was the first time that I saw someone using a necklace and a pendulum. It moved quite a bit, and it scared me to death. I started thinking of the things that happened to me in my house, and I was afraid that something would follow me home. There was quite a bit of confusion, jealousy, and fighting at that theatre, among employees. Once I graduated from high school, I worked as an assistant manager at a pizza restaurant. My co-manager was a drug dealer. He was always getting calls on his pager. He sometimes had some pretty weird conversations on the company phone.

I didn’t see my life being fulfilled, nor did I see it being fulfilled unless I did something. I tried to enroll in a junior college, but I didn’t have enough money to pay tuition. My mom spoke to me about paying rent. I could barely afford paying my car payment and insurance, much less rent. Going to college was starting to become a distant thought. I did what anyone desperate would do. I tried to get a loan for tuition. When I met with the counselor from the junior college, I was told that my dad made too much money for me to get a loan. I couldn’t afford college, not in my present situation. I had mentioned college to my dad in the past, and he never agreed to pay for college. I then started realizing I was in trouble. Unless I figured something out quickly, I would always be unhappy, due to my inability to achieve the things I strived for in life. A friend of mine was heading, to the Navy recruiter, for an appointment one day. I decided to tag along. I ended up joining the Navy. He went to college.


On my own

I served 4 years in the Navy. I got married after boot camp and had a daughter. We lived in Imperial Beach California with some Mormon friends. I was going to church every once in a while. I tried to get my patriotical blessing, which is a Mormon ceremony. The Mormon definition is: Revelatory prayer referencing life here in the Promised Land. I interviewed with a Mormon Bishop, and I don’t remember the details, but I wasn’t allowed to get my blessing. The Bishop, however, told a friend of mine that I was special, but he didn’t know why. Anyway, I wasn’t interested in pursuing the blessing any more, nor did I desire to go to the Mormon Church any more. It wasn’t because of anything in particular. I just felt weird in that church. I can’t explain it, but I knew something wasn’t right.

When I was stationed on the USS Durham LKA-114, I hung around some guys who played with ouija boards, amongst other things. Once, we used one in one of the cargo holds near the forward part of the ship. We were told something by the board. My hair stood up and I knew it was something evil. It affected me, and I’m sure it followed me. My marriage went down hill while I was in the military.

When I was released from active duty, I got a job working at a Semiconductor plant in Texas. I also started going to a private college. My marriage ended up in disagreements, which led to divorce. I found myself with nothing but work and school. I went to that school for 2 years, while I worked night shift. It was tough. I racked up a pretty hefty bill for school, which I still owe today. I did meet someone at work. I met someone very special to me. She is my wife today and has been for 10 years. She had a son in kinder-garden when we met. Her son is now my son. The only thing that separates us is blood, but my wife sometimes swears up and down that he is my twin. I didn’t start off treating my son right. I was very strict, and never let him have an ounce of rest. I would find myself being like my dad. I never noticed this happening until now. Now this kinder-gardener is now a junior in high school. I am just glad that my son is still at home, so I can make things right. I don’t want him to be a dad like me. I want him to be the exact opposite. I know I’ve got to get him into a Christian Church, which I have done. My wife and I had another son in 2004. He has been a blessing to our home. My parents and I don’t speak much these days. A lot of other things have happened, to cause our relationship to sour even more. My parents never wanted anything to do with my oldest son, but now want a relationship with the baby. This is not right, nor would it be right if I were to ignore the wrong being done.


Mormonism

My mom has tried to send the Mormon missionaries to my home many times. The first time the young, white shirt-wearing elders were at my home, I offered them water and spoke to them for a little while. They left on a good note, but I didn’t want to see them again. I think it was about the fourth or fifth time they came by, I asked them to please not return. I reminded them that I had asked them not to come back, but their response was "you need to write a letter to the church in Utah, and let them know, that you don’t want to be a Mormon." I asked them why I should have to write a letter to anyone just to get you guys not to harass me. One elder agreed with me, while the other shook his head. They then left after that conversation. I know how these young men feel, for I was in that same mind frame before, when I went to church very frequently as a child and young man, and even into my early 20’s. Later, I pondered the conversation I had with these missionaries, and a flag went up. This sounded just like an occult. They, the Mormons, wouldn’t leave me alone. Some of the nicest people I’ve ever met were Mormons. They are just lost in a religion full of deceit. I’ve lost my family, because of this deceit. I have a new family now. The devil took my family, for they are so lost in Mormonism, they hate anyone who isn’t, at least my mother and her mother did. My mother hates my wife and son, because they represent things not of Mormonism. My mother hasn’t ever had a reason to hate my wife or son. They never said nor done anything to my parents or me. My mother and her side of the family were always close, just like you’d find most Mormon families. They have this inner circle, and if you try to break that circle, you stir up those demons. Nothing but believing that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God will do. When children and even the young adults would go and bear their testimonies, in the front of the church, they would always say, "I know Joseph smith was a prophet of God, and this is the only true church."


Baptism for the Dead

I was once baptized, for the dead, at the Mormon temple in Dallas, Texas. The temple was beautiful. I can’t even imagine the amount of money used to build those temples. Others my age and I, went inside a special room, which had huge oxen made of what looked to be either brass or bronze. Maybe it was just painted, but I doubt it. These oxen held up a huge bowl, which was big enough for at least 4 people to stand in. The bowl was used to baptize for the dead. It was high in the air. The bench seats we sat on, waiting our turn to be baptized, had a walkway that led to a very beautiful looking deck, which led to the bowl held on the oxen’s back. We wore white jump suits, just like coveralls. I went last, and I was baptized for at least five or more people. We were told if we seen anything, don’t be afraid, for it was the spirits, of the people we were being baptized for, and they were happy. They wouldn’t harm us they said. They also said there had been times when the spirits were seen. The room was so beautiful, and because of this, no one spoke or said a word, because everyone was too busy looking around the room with our eyes. I wonder why only young kids are used in these ceremonies. Before being baptized for the dead, we had to confess our sins to our Bishop, and he would give the okay, if we could proceed with the baptism.

Lesson Learned:

Occults like Mormonism will not die. The devil uses these devices, much like you and I use cars. Occults take the devil where he wants us to go, and that’s not towards Heaven. I look back now and I can see, that throughout the years, children and others wishing they could belong to something, were brain washed. I’m sure that in Utah, the Mormon capital, I am still registered as a Mormon. I don’t care what they say. I will never fall into that pit again. I will never take that car ride towards the darkness again. It is a place of false peace, a place with false friends, a place with false hopes and dreams of becoming a God myself. Yes! I said, "a God myself." Mormons believe that one day, they too will be The God over other worlds. Mormons are an occult. If Mormons knew this, then they would probably not be Mormons. This is where the deceit from Satan plays. Occult members are misled, and they give their hearts and minds and later soul, to their beliefs. I know I can’t blame the Mormon religion for my childhood, and I don’t. What families do in their own home, can’t be blamed on anyone else, but the family in that home. I’m sure there are some Christian families that don’t follow God’s commands, while they are alone somewhere, or in the privacy of their homes, but I don’t consider them Christians either.

(Matthew 13:24-30)

Parable of the Wheat and Weeds

24 Here is another story Jesus told: "The Kingdom of Heaven is like a farmer who planted good seed in his field. 25 But that night as the workers slept, his enemy came and planted weeds among the wheat, then slipped away. 26 When the crop began to grow and produce grain, the weeds also grew. 27 "The farmer’s workers went to him and said, ‘Sir, the field where you planted that good seed is full of weeds! Where did they come from?’ 28 "‘An enemy has done this!’ the farmer exclaimed. "‘Should we pull out the weeds?’ they asked. 29 "‘No,’ he replied, ‘you’ll uproot the wheat if you do. 30 Let both grow together until the harvest. Then I will tell the harvesters to sort out the weeds, tie them into bundles, and burn them, and to put the wheat in the barn."


I asked God to save me

When I was in my early 20’s, I had a dream one night, which I will never forget. I was in front of a bright light, and in front of the light was Jesus. He spoke to me. He said, "Terry, you need to go to church." Many years went by. I thought of that dream. At the time no one was telling me to go to church. I was in the military, and church is usually a distant thing for most military personnel. At least it was at that time. I wasn’t sure then, if that was God speaking to me and like others, I ignored the message. My dad eventually joined the Mormon Church, while I was in the Navy. My mom and dad are active in the Mormon Church. Almost everyone on my mother’s side of the family is a Mormon.

When I asked the Lord for forgiveness, and asked the Lord to help me, he did. I had a fowl mouth for many years. Almost every word was a curse word. After the demon, which lived in me, was drove out of me by Jesus, my whole demeanor changed. I didn’t tell anyone besides my wife, about the events that changed my life forever. When I went to work, a couple of people asked me what was wrong. They said that they hadn’t heard me curse in days, and they knew something had to be wrong. I didn’t say anything to them, but then I felt an obligation to let everyone know what the Lord did for me. If you cursed all the time, in every sentence, and one day you stopped, you too would know that it was Divine Intervention. The Lord had made me a new creature in Christ. Out with the old me and in with the new. My wife had spoke with a few people, and gave me a phone number to a non-denominational preacher. My family now attends church regularly. My prayer life and relationship with God has gotten stronger, and now I put all my trust in Jesus. I do feel like a different person. I don’t listen to the heavy rock in roll or the rap music any more. I find myself listening only to Christian music. Years ago, I would have never listened to any Christian music, not even for a second. Now I need to hear it. It makes me happy and peaceful. I watch religious shows often, and I find myself reading a lot more. I have a hunger for God’s word. I don’t like watching some shows I use to watch. Some jokes aren’t funny any more. I have truly received a new heart from God. I didn’t have to quit my old habits and try to stop doing the "worldly" things I once done frequently. I stopped over night. I do truly mean 24 hrs. I, of course, am not near perfect. I have turned away from the sins I use to commit frequently. I have also had some other things happen to me that made me realize that God has been protecting me. My family and I were driving home one afternoon, and everyone in the car was asleep, except for me of course, because I was driving. I started to fall asleep at the wheel. All of a sudden, I felt a pair of hands pull my truck seat, which I was sitting in, back so far that it scared me. I could feel the place where the cushion was squeezed by the hands that saved my family that day. Everyone in the truck that day was still asleep, unaware of the tragedy that could have been. I knew within my heart what happened. Seats don’t just pull back with force for any reason. I didn’t hit any dips or bumps in the road. My wife’s seat didn’t move an inch. My oldest son was behind her, no one was behind me. The baby was in the back seat, in the center of the bench seat, asleep.

It took a long time, for me to find the Lord, but he has always been trying to find me. Once God had opened my eyes and started a tremendous work in my life, things didn’t get easy. I started seeing and feeling the presence of stronger demons around my house. I have always seen things, but I don’t see demons every day, nor do I want to. Years use to go by before I would see anything, but now that has changed. I was lying down on the couch one night, and before I could go to sleep, I felt someone speaking to me in my ear. The demon said, "I will make sure you die"! I felt the breathe of the demon on my ear, as if someone was whispering to me. I quickly sat up and began to pray. As I was praying, I looked straight ahead and seen the demon. It was about 2 feet tall and a shadow. It moved its head and arms around my son’s little playhouse, in order to peak around the corner at me. When I looked right at it, it seemed surprised that I could see it. I could tell this by its actions. It jumped back a little and I started praying and demanding it be gone in the name of Jesus. When I opened my eyes again, it was gone. That really scared me at the time. Now I look at it from a different frame of mind. If that Demon could have killed me or even hurt me, it would have. Besides that, lets go back to the basics. If there is evil, then there has to be good. If not, the evil would take completely over. I have seen Demons. These demons have also proven to me that God exists. My faith in Christ has grown tremendously because of this. I know not everyone can see demons. That is why I am sharing all I know with you. That is what the Lord wants. Like I said earlier, I was told to go to church by Jesus. It took years, but here I am today in church. I do believe that everyone has a certain task or many tasks to do here on the Earth. What the details are, no one but God knows. You can do what the Lord wants now, or you can wait years before you follow him, for the Lord gave us all free will. I do have a better understanding why God gave us free will. Just like the saying, if you love something set it free, if it comes back it is yours, if it does not, it never was. This is how you prove your love to the Lord. If you return to the Lord, after he set you free, that is a great sign of your love. Go back to him and let him know that you are his child, and not a child of wrath. Do remember though, there is only one road to Heaven, and that’s through Jesus Christ. There isn’t any other path to Heaven except Jesus. When I hear Oprah and Obama saying that they are Christians, but yet they say that there are many roads to Heaven, it totally disgusts me. I know what it takes to be a Christian. Its sacrifice, its Faith, its totally believing that the bible is the inspired word of God, from the phrase, in the beginning, to the last dot in the back of the bible. This is the cost of Discipleship. You have to be willing to deny yourself and the things of this world. There is a much bigger battle going on, which we can’t see. God sometimes allows some of us to see it, but he does so because he wants us to be a tempered sword, hardened in the strongest flames. Wikipedia gives the definition of tempering as: Tempering is a heat treatment technique for metals and alloys. In steels, tempering is done to "toughen" the metal by transforming brittle martensite into bainite or a combination of ferrite and cementite. So, lets be "toughened" so when the battle comes, you wont run scared. You need to cast your fear away like yesterday’s garbage. I want to be ready at all times, so if I get the chance, I can go into the battle and not fail our ever loving, ever lasting, perfect, and Holy God. Like any soldier, I must be ready for anything. I must have my gear ready, and my weapon must be cleaned, so it doesn’t jam when firing; therefore, I must have the Word of God written on my heart, and I must use it boldly with absolute faith and never ever trust anything else. When attacked, I must use the word of God as he intended us to use it. We have been given power, for there is protection in the blood of Jesus, and Power in God’s Word. We have to be ready with all the armor of God. We must be able to adorn this armor and use it with ever lasting faith. If we lose faith, if we turn away from God, if we continue to lust after the things of this world, how will God ever trusts you with his armor? If we lose the battle, and never turn back to God and repent, then we can lose our souls into the pit of everlasting torment. Hell is a real place. I recently read the book 23 minutes in hell. It is an incredible book. It is a remarkable and insightful read. I recommend it to everyone. We need to do as much as we can to be prepared for whatever lies ahead. I believe in hell, and I am not going there, and neither shall you. Brother Mitch, who leads the music at The House of Prayer in Reno Texas, which is the church I go to, has died and gone to Hell. I’m not sure when it happened, but he is still trying, to over come the experience he had in hell. He has mentioned it a few times, but I am still waiting on the details.

(Mark 8:34)

34 Then, calling the crowd to join his disciples, he said, "If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me."

God started tempering me when I was a young child. I do know that when I tell others about my experiences, I’ve gotten all kinds of looks. Most people don’t say anything derogatory, but I know most people are a "doubting Thomas". Most people wonder how come they don’t see demons. They wonder why they don’t have any "real big" problems. They think that since they found God, that demons can’t bother them. Well, in the bible, Job sure was bothered by demons. His whole family died and Job lost everything. He was even physically attacked with boils. Then God seen him through, and God increased everything Job started with twofold, but only after Job prayed for his friends.

(Job 42:10)

10 When Job prayed for his friends, the Lord restored his fortunes. In fact, the Lord gave him twice as much as before!

Every time I tell others about demons, I get attacked some how. The last time I was attacked was in a dream. I walked down a dirt hill, and went between some houses. When I got to the back of the houses, it was more like a coliseum. There weren’t any fences. I tried to walk straight ahead between two more exits, but I had to go up a hill of mud. I even picked up the mud and threw it down. I, then seen two "dogs" growling at me and moving slowly towards me. I started backing up slowly and heading out the way I entered. I then noticed that on all the balconies were at least hundreds of these "dogs" and some of the demons were as tall as humans, but I couldn’t make out what they were. One of the "dogs" was a white shaggy dog. I couldn’t see it’s eyes, but it grabbed a hold of my left forearm and started to growl. I tried to see its eyes again, but the hair hid it. Then I woke up, and for a second I seen this "shaggy dog" on my arm still, but this time the background was my room. It disappeared and I got up and laughed. I said out loud, so the demons watching me could hear me. I said, "That’s all you can do, c’mon, that’s it?" I then called for my wife, whom was in the living room, and we prayed. I also started to "clean" out my bedroom. I pled the blood of Jesus and I used the authority Jesus gave in the bible.

(Matthew 10:1)

Jesus called his twelve disciples together and gave them authority to cast out evil spirits and to heal every kind of disease and illness.

(Mark 6:7)

7 And he called his twelve disciples together and began sending them out two by two, giving them authority to cast out evil spirits.

(Mark 16:17)

17 These miraculous signs will accompany those who believe: They will cast out demons in my name, and they will speak in new languages

(Luke 9:1)

1 One day Jesus called together his twelve disciples and gave them power and authority to cast out all demons and to heal all diseases.

Lessons learned:

I’ve learned about demons the hard way. Let me tell you some things I do know. Let me begin by giving some information from the dreams I have had, and the things I’ve seen. I will not include anything that I haven’t witnessed first hand. I have learned some from reading the bible, but again, I’ve seen the following things first hand.

· Demons will get next to the bible, even if you leave it open. I still leave mine open to Psalms 91.

· Demons can’t kill you, unless you haven’t stayed the path with God.

· Demons are cowards. They attack you while you sleep. They attack in the dark

· Demons do not like any bright light. This is because Jesus is the everlasting light, and they have to hide behind something.

If you know they exist, they have lost the first stage of war, which is, to know your enemy.

· Demons whisper in the ears of unsuspecting victims. You will think it’s your own thoughts.

· Demons hate the Word of God being read out loud

· Demons will help you gain knowledge that God hasn’t given to you, and most of it will be true, but not all of it.

· Demons use anything in your home, as in objects, to bring fear into your heart.

· Demons will try to break up your family, by divide and conquering.

· Demons will keep you awake at night, so you wont get the sleep you need, because when most people get tired, they become

irritable, short-tempered, and can’t think straight. The demons will do this, by making noises right before you fall asleep.

· Demons will manifest themselves to you, so your heart will tremble, and you will fear them more than God.

· Demons prey on children.

· Demons tell people what to do and think. I have had some thoughts, which came out of nowhere, which were not of God.

I rebuke those thoughts.

· Demons want to see you miserable and dead. I was told that by a demon, who wanted to see me dead.

· Demons come in all sizes and shapes. I’ve seen one that was about 2 feet tall, I’ve seen one that was in a form of a wolf, I’ve seen one take the form of a lady, which ran across my game room floor, while I was using my computer on a Halloween night.

I was helping pray for a young man one day, and he was being oppressed by a demon, as we prayed, he started shaking and he slid out of the chair onto the floor, he was trying to get away from us. We kept praying and he soon quit moving. He lay there onthe floor for five to ten minutes, and then he got up. He gave his testimony. He said had been under demonic influence for afew years. He was finally set free. His mother, whom brought him, was crying tears of joy.


All good things come from GOD

Now, I can’t end this without writing about God and his Angels. I know a lot about God, because the Bible tells me anything I need to know. All the questions, which are unanswered about God, don’t need to be answered. I will quote a good friend in Christ, who I consider a brother. His name is Bill, and he has been through quite a bit himself. In one of his sermons, he said, "The things not mentioned in the bible don’t matter, because those things have nothing to do with your salvation." He was absolutely right. I do know that when I repent and follow the Lord, the Lord does answer my prayers. I don’t demand that the Lord does anything, for whom am I to demand anything from God? I have been in some bad situations, and I prayed to the Lord, and he did answer my prayer the next day. I do know that when I’m doing things that I shouldn’t, I haven’t seen the Lord help me, at least not something physical. I’m sure that he helps me learn from mistakes I make. That’s not the learning I want to do, even though it strengthens me. I’d rather just know the correct things and not do those things that displease the Lord. Unfortunately, I do not learn without the hardships of life. God loves me, or he would let me go off the deep end, because he will not violate our free will. Okay, let talk about the Angels, whom God commands. I have had the following Angel encounters that I know of:

· I had an Angel grab my seat and wake me up, while I was driving the family home. This is mentioned above.

· I had two Angels, who were wearing suits, come to me in a dream, and tell me that my son was being attacked by a demon, and

they told me to go over and pray for him.

· I had the one Angel mentioned earlier disguise itself as my mother.


My last thoughts

I’m sure I’ve been protected since childhood, for God was working on me, to get me to some place he wants me. I’m not sure where that place is, but I do know he’s doing a quick work on me. I put all my faith in God. I’ve seen first hand that there is a spiritual battle going on. It’s not just something we read in a book that’s over 2000 years old. This book, the Bible, is God inspired. God made sure that his Word survived, for all of us today and for all tomorrow. Just like a Buddhist, whom I had the pleasure of sitting next to on an airplane, asked me, if I thought God was perfect. I answered without delay. I said, "He sure is!" That was an interesting conversation. It lasted about 30 minutes. He spoke about everything from politics to God. He finally said, "thanks, for the conversation." I know I have a long way to go, and I have some things to learn, but I’m getting there. I hope that you give God your heart and let him do amazing things in your life. May God bless all who read this.


Praise you God!